Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Tomorrow

Tomorrow I am graduating from graduate school. I have spent 8 years in college total. 3 of those years in grad school. I've put in countless hours, thousands and thousands (and thousands) of dollars, every ounce of my energy, time, emotion, thought and life really into this endeavor. I'm not ready for it to end. It feels so incredibly final. I love what I do. I love waking up every morning and going to my studio at school. I love my professors, the other students, the deadlines, the chaos, the all nighters, and yes, even the stress. I thrive on it. I am so sad to be leaving it all behind. I cant even explain how I feel right now. Im sad. Im scared. Im afraid of not having this anymore. I know I should be excited to finally finish school. To finally be done with assignments and grades and tuition bills. But Im not excited about it. I don't want to loose the camaraderie I have with the other students. I love the crazy, busy, crowded environment of my studio. I love the sense of community. I love that there is someone to talk to about my ideas, my failures, my problems, or whatever, any time of day. I love that someone will always go on a midnight candy run with me. I love how all my studio mates tease me for watching Twilight 600 times but love me anyway. I love Tedd and Becky McDonah for being the most amazing professors ever. I love that there is always something going on, always something to do. There is so much energy, so much life at school. I love that my studio mates are like my family. I am always learning, teaching and growing. I don't want that to change. I don't want to leave my safe world of academia. I wish I could stay forever.

2 comments:

Valerie A. Heck said...

It'll be ok, change is good even if it is hard.

Kirsty said...

Sounds like you've found your new profession - teacher!! That way you won't have to leave.

Good luck, whatever you decide.